Bag of Randomness for Wednesday, July 1, 2020


Yesterday I had a daily multi-vitamin bottle in my hand and grabbed the vitamin-D bottle only to find it hasn’t been opened yet. I needed to break the seal on the vitamin-d bottle, but was having the darndest time doing so with the multi-vitamin bottle in my hand. Now, I could have simply put the multi-vitamin bottle down and easily opened the vitamin-D bottle, but in my mind that felt like defeat and my masculinity score would have dropped a few notches. I never could break the right plastic seal on the exterior of the bottle with my fingers, so I resorted to using my teeth, which worked out.


When President Trump said the country would reopen by Easter, I guess we didn’t know he meant Easter 2021.


Stolen from WifeGeeding’s Facebook account.

Coronavirus explained in craft terms – You and nine friends are crafting. One is using glitter. How many projects have glitter?


I didn’t know that in Texas, the justice of the peace had to take classes to retain their office. Per Wikipedia: “New JPs are required to take 80 hours of legal, state-mandated classes the first year, and 20 hours each year thereafter during their tenure in office.”


Texas Monthly – Do You Have What It Takes to Be a Master Auctioneer?Eight days inside America’s Auction Academy, learning the secrets of “the dynamo from Dallas.”

Live bid-calling is like a series of contracts, and when an auctioneer says “Sold,” accepting the bid, the highest bidder is on the hook. Therefore, each part of the chant is crucial. “A chant is made of three components: a statement, a question, and a suggestion,” Jones began. The jumbles of syllables between the numbers are called filler words. The basic chant Jones proposed—the one we would employ for the remainder of the class and that would provide a soundtrack for all our dreams and nightmares—was “One dollar bid, now two, now two, will you give me two?”

This chant was the “Dick and Jane” of the form, the starter set upon which we would build our own auctioneer identities. A chant is as much a trademark to an auctioneer as James Brown’s scream and Bob Wills’s high-pitched holler were to them. All chants, Jones stressed, must be conducive to rhythm, melody, and clarity, exploiting words that easily roll off the tongue. Filler words and phrases like “bid ’em at” and “gimme” and “I’m bid” and “how ’bout” are better than “what about,” since consonants that use the front of the mouth (like b) require less breath than letters like w. Jones asked us to hold our hands in front of our mouths to compare “who” to “gimme” to demonstrate how much more breath was required for the former. The numbers need to be clear; the filler words are there for pleasure—to add an energetic, pressing, hypnotic quality. Filler words should give buyers time to consider their next offers but not so much time that the rhythm of the chant is broken. A clunky chant could lead to a hoarse auctioneer and confused or sluggish audience members, reluctant to bid.


I only watched a handful of episodes of Frasier, but I thought Peri Gilpin (Roz) had a very attractive voice. I had no idea she was born in Waco, grew up in Dallas, graduated from Skyline, and was a Longhorn.


Something for my fellow mask-wearing Hamilton friends. I thought this was pretty clever and funny.


Edmunds expert Mark Takahashi takes his automotive design criticism to the next level by highlighting why some modern car design trends need to go away.

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Bag of Randomness for Tuesday, June 30, 2020


One of my high school friends had a son who graduated high school this year. He sent me a text and stated he’d like to send us an announcement, which arrived in yesterday’s mail. I noticed the handwriting was that of his wife’s. I’m not offended by any means, but I thought it was one of those things in which the graduate is supposed to write and send all the announcements.


San Francisco Giants commit to cardboard cutouts instead of fans for 2020 season


I have a feeling this is gonna be really good and you’ll see all things Lucy.

Cate Blanchett’s Lucille Ball Biopic Moving Forward at Amazon, Receives California Tax Credit – Written by Aaron Sorkin

Somewhat related – The Return Of The House DressThe ’50s Staple Has Come A Long Way From Homemaker’s Uniform


Trump Misidentifies Sculpture in Oval Office While Saying Statues Help Teach History

President Trump stood next to a sculpture in the Oval Office that he said depicts former president Teddy Roosevelt, and explained that statues are vital to learning about history. Trump went on to complain that some people want to tear down statues of President Roosevelt, just like the art in his office. The only problem? The sculpture Trump was talking about isn’t Teddy Roosevelt. It’s an anonymous cowboy from the 1890s.

This reminds of the story of former President George W. Bush possibly misinterpreting the meaning behind a painting that hung in his office as governor and the Oval Office named “A Charge to Keep.” The painting is even included in his official portrait. There may be little truth to the story but I’ll leave it up to you and the sources (leftist) and updates stated in this and this article.

He came to believe that the picture depicted the circuit-riders who spread Methodism across the Alleghenies in the nineteenth century. In other words, the cowboy who looked like Bush was a missionary of his own denomination.Only that is not the title, message, or meaning of the painting. The artist, W.H.D. Koerner, executed it to illustrate a Western short story entitled “The Slipper Tongue,” published in The Saturday Evening Post in 1916. The story is about a smooth-talking horse thief who is caught, and then escapes a lynch mob in the Sand Hills of Nebraska. The illustration depicts the thief fleeing his captors. In the magazine, the illustration bears the caption: “Had His Start Been Fifteen Minutes Longer He Would Not Have Been Caught.”


 

 

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Bag of Randomness for Monday, June 29, 2020


I have this crazy ability not to be able to find the remote or my phone when either is right next to me. It’s not that they are misplaced, I know they are somewhere within arm’s reach because I recently used them, I just can’t find them. It’ll get to the point that I use my hands to feel the area all around me only to stand up and find the object, right next to me, and then I sit down in defeat.


Saturday was the 22nd anniversary of my father’s death. I did the math, and come this April 24, I will have lived more days with my father being dead than alive.


As I expected, my COVID-19 test result came back negative.


Texas Republicans move forward with plans for an indoor convention in Houston, the state’s biggest coronavirus hot spot

Gov. Greg Abbott is allowing limits on outdoor crowds — but not indoor gatherings. His party’s convention — with an expected attendance of 6,000 — so far will not require attendees to wear face masks.


WifeGeeding’s father and brother killed a 400-pound alligator on their property this weekend. The only place that had a scale large enough to weigh it was the local fertilizer plant.

WifeGeeding’s father and said gator.
WifeGeeding’s father, said gator, and some dude at the fertilizer plant. 


A small update on the renovation of the Baker Hotel in Mineral Wells.


Planets and dwarf planets to scale in size, rotation speed and axial tilt (in order of distance from the Sun).

FAQ: the tilts would ordinarily be all upright in a perfect system because dust and gas all orbited the same way in the early solar system. However, impacts by giant asteroids/planetesimals during this time will tend to modify that, in addition to planetary migration. Impacts to Uranus have been simulated by scientists here and please stop smirking about this sentence.

https://twitter.com/physicsJ/status/1219974650224136192

 

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Bag of Randomness for Friday, June 26, 2020

When I first saw this photo, probably around 1985, I thought it was probably taken 20 years ago. In truth, I was probably 20 to 25 years off. Now that we’re in 2020, that picture is now closer to 50-55 years old. Point being, we think this sort of stuff happened much further in the past of our nation’s history when in reality, it wasn’t that long ago. If I understand this two-year-old article correctly, Texas didn’t really start desegregation until the Seventies. Equal rights, that’s all that’s being asked. Today, some may beg to differ with Black Lives Matter and argue many blacks want revenge and that’s the reason for looting and rioting. But wouldn’t it be something if you could just treat someone equally? That you could simply admit that they matter, not that they are better or more important, just that they matter. If you treat someone as your equal and let them know through your actions that they matter, you wouldn’t need to fear or imagine anything about revenge.


WifeGeeding got her prosthetic-eye professionally polished yesterday. She has that done at least yearly.


I guess we’re all in agreement that the biggest tragedy in sports this year is that the XFL couldn’t complete their second inaugural season. Damn, life ain’t fair.


I wonder how Shepard Smith is doing and what he’s been up to since leaving Fox News.


The Fourth of July is next weekend. People are going to gather. COVID-19 is going spread like wildfire. I just don’t see schools opening. I don’t understand how kindergarten teachers like WifeGeeding are going to successfully be able to teach four and five-year-olds via distance learning.


Almost 1 in 3 pilots in Pakistan have fake licenses, aviation minister says

More than 30% of civilian pilots in Pakistan have fake licenses and are not qualified to fly, the country’s aviation minister revealed Wednesday.

Addressing Pakistan’s National Assembly, Ghulam Sarwar Khan said 262 pilots in the country “did not take the exam themselves” and had paid someone else to sit it on their behalf. “They don’t have flying experience,” he said.

I would definitely buy a car from this woman, especially if she pulled this stunt in front of me. I wouldn’t’ care if the truck snot working. That goofy smile she’s trying to hold in at the very end is cute as heck.


Daughter of Michigan Republican urges people to vote against her dad



A lot of locals are complaining that the newly completed Texas Rangers new ballpark doesn’t live up to artist’s renderings when it was first shown to the public (lack of glass as LiberallyLean pointed out). I bet the Oakland A’s fans will have the same feeling in 2023, which is supposed to be on the water.

 



I’m soooo reminded of my teen years as a Baptist youth.

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