Bag of Randomness for Wednesday, January 17, 2024

  • NASA is trying to turn the sonic boom into the sonic thump.
  • What the heck did the reporter have in mind when asking this question?

  • Every home team won their playoff game except our Dallas Cowboys.
  • Seeing arrogant and cocky Philly head coach Nick Sirianni’s team implode brings joy to most of the football world.
  • Everyone laughed at this tweet sent by the @AtlantaFalcons on Monday, “We have interviewed Bill Belichick for our head coach opening.” Why the laughter? Because everyone knew it wasn’t the Falcons interviewing him, it was Belichick interviewing the Falcons. More than likely, it went like this. Team owner Arthur Blank tried to start a legitimate interview, then Bill Belichick grimaced, and said, “Look, here’s how this is gonna go …”
  • Belichick will not make up his mind about where he is going until Jerry makes up his mind.
  • Belichick has a lot of admiration for Roger Staubach. His father coached at Navy when Staubach played, and seriously, they used to play catch. If I were to write some Dallas Cowboys fan fiction (though, I wouldn’t doubt this may be happening), I’d have Jerry communicating through back channels to Belichick through Staubach.
  • Per Jay Fowler of ESPN, Bill Belichick is seeking to coach a “talented” but “underachieving” team. This has Dallas written all over it, and I’m sure he can’t wait to coach the closest version of LT he’ll ever see with Micah Parsons. Eagles fans think this means he’s coming to Philly. He ain’t going to Philly.
    https://twitter.com/Thomas_Carrieri/status/1747103480987177463
  • A lot of folks keep blaming ownership (Jerry) for the Cowboys not making it to the NFC Championship game over the last 28 years. I think that was a legitimate argument before Parcells coached the team. Since Parcells, the Cowboys have made the playoffs nine times. The last three years they went 12-5. Most GM duties are done by Will McClay. How exactly is ownership failing the team? Jerry and his family aren’t putting the pads on or calling the plays. Sure, he and his family are the one constant, but what more or what less can he do?
  • I don’t like how Iowa is always the first state that kicks off the presidential race for a plethora of reasons. I don’t know what I want, but I know I don’t like Iowa kicking things off.
  • I’m not saying I want this, but I’d like to hear a healthy debate there being no party nominations or state runoffs for the presidential race. Just one election the second Tuesday in November and that’s it.
  • https://twitter.com/buitengebieden/status/1747380542503358647

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Bag of Randomness for Monday, January 15, 2024

  • The Cowboys are simply not a cold-weather team.
  • Somewhere out there someone read that last sentence and said, “But Keith, they play indoors.” Yes, I know we play indoors. That’s the joke.
  • Well, Arlington is a baseball town anyways.
  • The Cowboys had seven pro-bowlers, the Packers had none. The Packers have played a total of 12 games in that stadium and have never lost.
  • The Cowboys have been 12-5 for the last three years. Belichick wants to pass Shula on the all-time wins list. No team is best suited to get him that record faster. He’ll get that record in Dallas in two seasons, four seasons with any other team. Especially with our weak division. He’ll have to rebuild with other teams and at his age, isn’t that patient. Some will argue that he will want all control, and Jerry won’t give that up. Beleichick’s mentor, Bill Parcells, was famous for saying, “If you want me to do the cooking, you should let me buy the groceries.” And, he worked with Jerry. As a matter of factor, I bet Parcells and Belichick will talk this week about what it was like working for and with Jerry. Not to mention, Will McClay has been the GM here for years (in all but title) and has a great track record with the draft and free agents, he’ll stay on staff. One may argue the Terrell Owens situation. That was long ago, Jerry has learned from that, and proof of that was when he didn’t draft Johnny Manzel. I predict most of this will happen the week before the Super Bowl. But don’t think just because the New England Patriots planes are at Alliance Airport right now will mean anything, they are just being worked on. Oh, one more thing that relates to the next bullet point. If you watch pro football documentaries, you know Belichick and Jimmy Johnson are good friends. So much so, Bill will stay nights at Jimmy’s place and go boating. Jimmy and Jerry have patched things up. Jimmy will help sell Belichick on Dallas.
  • This was Jimmy Johnson at halftime, he was fired up.
    https://twitter.com/TheDallasNation/status/1746671457617232187
  • A lot of the men in my divorce support group made mention of this – The Miami Heat waited until Erik Spoelstra was finished with his divorce proceedings to give him the $120 million contract extension.
  • It was neat seeing two competing meteorologists complement each other.

  • When it comes to playoffs and championship games, this man is a cancer.

  • Great tradition.
    https://twitter.com/DallasStars/status/1745966306686337220
  • In case you wondered what an underground heating system looks like under a football field.

  • This had to be a great feeling for both the author and the teacher.

  • We all have that one team member, don’t we?
    https://twitter.com/PicturesFoIder/status/1746518406340440501
  • https://twitter.com/KillaCam0531/status/1746179004715913627

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Bag of Randomness for Thursday, January 11, 2024

  • The best rumor I heard last night regarding Nick Saban’s retirement was that Steve Sarkisian was going to replace him at Alabama and take Arch Manning with him. Now, wouldn’t that be something? The next UT/Alabama game would be circled on every college football fan’s calendar. It is a little funny that before Sarkisian was hired at Texas, there were strong rumors of Texas trying to hire Saban. The best part of that rumor was how they were trying to sell the job to him. Basically, it was said he was enticed by his agent saying he’ll never surpass Bear Bryant as the greatest coach at Alabama, but what he could do was go to Texas, win a national championship, and be known are the only coach to win national championships at three different universities and therefor the greatest in college football history. True or not, I like the story.
  • Who’s older, Nick Saban or Mack Brown? That’s a bit of a trick question, both are 72, with Brown being born in August and Saban in October. One man has been comfortable with his hair color naturally changing to gray and white for quite a while now and the other continues to dye it a ridiculous color.
  • I remember talking to my a very politically conservative MIL who, when asked what’s the most important trait of the USA, answered capitalism. In that same conversation, she also stated college football coaches were excessively overpaid and all that money should be going to public schools, which didn’t support her earlier argument of capitalism. But, I digress. Anywho, I thought of that conversation when I read the following yesterday:

  • I remember my dad once half-seriously telling me that if I became a mortician, I would never run out of business.
  • I don’t know much about Hunter Biden other than his sordid past. But yesterday he pulled the rug out from MTG (who likes to show photos of his reproductive organ, and may have sent them to minors). As soon as she started talking, he walked out, baiting the reporters and cameras outside. All the major cable networks had started carrying the hearing live when he walked in and sat for about ten minutes. When he left, he took away her only chance of having national airtime. The networks cut away from the hearing while his lawyer made a statement to the cameras outside. Had Biden stayed, MTG would’ve had five minutes of uninterrupted airtime on Fox, CNN, MSNBC, etc. I doubt it was his idea, but it was honestly a brilliant political play.
  • I think I’ll just stick to the traditional Big Mac, though I wasn’t aware the chain has done a burger overhaul – McDonald’s is bringing the Double Big Mac back to US menus.
    • Unlike the previous version, this Double Big Mac highlights McDonald’s overhaul of its core burger offerings, which includes softer buns, adjusting its grill settings for a better sear and improving how the cheese melts. Big Macs, in particular, are getting more sauce.
  • That time David Letterman lost $100 to Cybill Shepherd who threw a football into a trashcan by banking it off a wall. I have it qued up for you. If you watch until the 2:39 mark, Dave has one of his all-time best one-liners. If you skip to the very end of the clip, you’ll see Dave, Cybill, and Joe Wyoming all successfully throw a football into a moving NYC taxi. Cybill (yes, I’m on a first-name basis with her) was a great guest. Here’s the time she walked out with nothing but a towel on and sat through the entire interview that way. You’ll notice this was during a time when Paul would not play any music when a guest walked out. That’s right, music wasn’t always played when a guest walked out to Dave’s desk. And one more Cybill fact, she dated Elvis and taught him how to, uh, orally take care of her.
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Bag of Randomness for Wednesday, January 10, 2024

  • Barry over at LiberallyLean posted a New York Times article that referenced a marijuana dispensary in New Mexico just across the Texas border in El Paso. Texans get a discount on Texas Tuesdays. But as most Texans know, just possessing a small amount of it in Texas is illegal and the punishment can be severe. For instance, in Texas, possession of marijuana under two ounces is still punishable by up to 180 days in jail and up to a $2,000 fine. Possession of marijuana between two and four ounces is still punishable by up to one year in jail and a $4,000 fine.It would be easy for Texas law enforcement to wait at the border and nab a Texas buyer driving back home. But what I found interesting is the business opportunity that creates. New Mexico.

    For now, Texans mostly just turn around and go home. “The recreational tourism part of it hasn’t really hit at all,” said Robert Ardovino, the owner of a local restaurant, who also offers vintage Spartan trailers from the 1950s for overnight stays by the mountains, under the desert stars. He, too, was looking into opening a dispensary and maybe, one day, a consumption site.

    Now, that’s an interesting business opportunity. I guess that’s similar to when Texans drive to Oklahoma or Louisiana to gamble and stay overnight in a casino hotel. Border states make a lot of money from the sinful of Texas.

    All of that got me wondering about this scenario. Let’s say my friend Tony and I drive to that New Mexico dispensary. Tony buys the smallest amount of edible he can, consumes it, and throws away what he has remaining while still in New Mexico. Cannibus is now inside of Tony but I’m totally clean. I drive us back to El Paso where we stay at an Airbnb. There is no cannabis on either of us. But, of course, there is cannabis inside of Tony that is being digested. Tony is never high in public, but he starts to feel high (and hungry) an hour after we get back from New Mexico inside the Airbnb. Tony cuts himself while slicing a watermelon. The wound is bad enough that I have to drive him to the ER. On our way to the ER, I get pulled over for speeding. For whatever reason, the officer knows where we’ve been and what’s inside Tony. Can Tony be arrested for possession because it’s inside his body being digested?

    And, let’s say while talking to the officer, Tony stresses out to the point he vomits in the car. There is now a small amount of undigested cannabis on the floorboard. At that point, can either of us be arrested for possession?

  • The Secretary of Defense really did his nation a disservice by not notifying his boss that he was going to be hospitalized. I understand wanting some privacy, but it’s not like he’s managing a Wendy’s.
  • It’s absurd he’s still closely tied with that or any university.

  • I’m a big fan of The Lincoln Project and follow them on Twitter. They recently asked, “When’s the last time you guys think Trump went to a gas station to fill up his car?” Funny thing, just the other day I ran across an old picture of Trump (presumedly) pumping gas. I guess because it’s being sold at an auction at the end of the month.
  • The Ticket plays a commercial plugging an upcoming John Mulaney show. In the spot, the comedian makes fun of people who send an iMessage text or start a FaceTime session from an email address. He thinks is a very strange thing to do. I guess you have to count me amongst the strange. I don’t have an iPhone, but I do have an iPad. It’s the same situation for BoyGeeding and GirlGeeding. For a while, the only way for me to communicate with my kids was by using the iPad, and none of us had a phone number.
  • I had no idea it comes so “packaged.”
    https://twitter.com/EvanKirstel/status/1744252662747471927
  • A website that sells toilet paper to help you cheer on your team but wipe away their opponents. I guess it would be funny to invite a Packers fan to watch the game with me this weekend and set these up in the guest bathroom with nothing else to use so they are forced to use these.

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