From Letterman last night

#3 cracked me up the most

Top Ten Things Elvis Would Say If He Were Alive Today

10. “Turn on Regis — I feel like some target practice”
9. “Wow, Canada really does offer great savings on prescription drugs!”
8. “Why do I have to pay $35 to get into my own house?”
7. “From now on I want to be known as E. Diddy”
6. “Tell Cybill Shepherd to get her ass over here. King wants some lovin”
5. “Big Mac, 9-piece McNugget and do you have Whoppers or is that the other guys?”
4. “Doctors don’t know anything — all cholesterol is “good” cholesterol”
3. “John Wayne never would have made a gay cowboy movie”
2. “My daughter married who?”
1. “Sonny! Red! Get me out of this coffin!”

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