10 Reasons Why Johnny Cash Owns Chuck Norris

jcahsfasd-2.jpgI edited the list by modifying the curse words, but you can view the original list here.

Reason 1.
Only one man who has ever lived has been bad enough to be called “The Man In Black” and it wasn’t Chuck Norris

Reason 2.
Johnny didn’t have to fight to be a tough guy. He just had to pick up a beer bottle and a guitar.

Reason 3.
Norris made a bunch of films where he killed folks. Johnny Cash went to Folsom Prison and did a concert. You tell me which one takes more guts.

Reason 4.
Chuck wasn’t the first of his kind to kick butt. Johnny was the first rock star to set something on fire. While most artists only set their hotel rooms on fire, Johnny took it one step further and burned down half a national forest.

Reason 5.
When Chuck was five, he was a normal five year old. Johnny had already earned man points by working in his dad’s cotton fields.  By the time he was six, Cash did more hard work than most men do in their whole life.

Reason 6.
Chuck never got stabbed in the back by a woman. Johnny never stopped bleeding. Chuck may have gotten punched a few times, but Johnny knew what real pain was.

Reason 7.
Chuck is a republican. Johnny was close with every president except for GWB. It was said he just didn’t trust that weasel. When Johnny didn’t trust someone, you just knew something foul was going on.

Reason 8.
Johnny was invited to play the at White House in 1972 for Richard Nixon. He was given a list of politically correct songs to sing. He instead metaphorically threw up his middle finger at the establishment and sang a set full of left leaning, politically charged tunes. Chuck Norris has never told the president to take off in his own house.

Reason 9.
Chuck Norris made a lot of crappy movies. Johnny Cash never touched anything that didn’t turn to gold. In the 80’s, he made a song called “Chicken in Black” to get himself out of a record deal. Even that became popular.

Reason 10.
Johnny is the only man in history to decline painkillers after a double bypass heart surgery. He knew he liked drugs too damn much and wouldn’t stop. That shows power over an addiction previously not seen before. Kicking a ninja’s rear end is easy compared to kicking a drug’s butt.

Writer’s Note: I am by no means a country music fan, but Johnny Cash transcends genre.

1 Comment

Getmooh

getmoohafsd4.jpgGetmooh is an automated call back service. It is designed to help you escape a variety of situations by calling you automatically on your phone at a pre-specified time and playing you a recording which will either instruct you on what to say to elude your tormentor(s), or which will simply give a convincing sense of you being on an important call.

Comments Off on Getmooh

Tiny Living

apartasdsmall.jpgCreated as a response to new york city’s cramped living conditions, tiny living is a store that aims to provide solutions for small spaces.  The founders, a husband and wife team, have spent many years living in cramped new york city apartments- one of which was a studio that measured a mere 200 sq. ft. Tiny Living offers a range of cleverly designed, affordable items that are small in scale, multi-purpose, flexible or organizational.

Link

Not safe for claustrophobics.

Comments Off on Tiny Living