I decided to give Keri Russell’s new Netflix show, The Diplomat, a try. I could only make it through the first two and a half episodes. It was hard for me to warm up to her costar Rufus Sewell. So, I searched for another series to watch, and landed on The Man in the High Castle. A little into the show, who shows up but Rufus Sewell. Oddly, I like him in The Man in the High Castle; he makes a great American Nazi.
Last week I binged all seven seasons of Nurse Jackie. Oddly, it wasn’t streaming anywhere. I had to buy each season individually for ten bucks a piece.
I was feeling so good regarding lack of pain and range of motion; I was feeling up to taking BoyGeeding to his soccer game the following morning after surgery. BoyGeeding forgot to pack something, I think his jersey, so I let *XWifeGeeding know we’d be coming over to her casa before the game to pick it up. While she didn’t show any signs of being upset, one could tell that she wasn’t exactly happy or comfortable with me driving. Trust me, if I thought there was any danger of putting my son in harm’s way, I wouldn’t. She even volunteered to drive both of us to and from the game. For a brief second, I was going to take her up on the offer. Then, not only did I think of the awkwardness of it all, but recalled how the last time BoyGeeding and I took his belongings out of her SUV, I placed a book I gifted her in the driver’s seat, and how she called the police on me. I didn’t want to put myself in a vulnerable position, so I politely declined her request.
To my surprise, when XWifeGeeding found me at the game, she set her folding chair next to me, and we watched the entire game together. I’m scared to let my guard down around her. To me, there’s no telling what she might take as offensive and call the cops on me for. However, to my surprise, at the end of the game when I got up to fold my folding chair (which rocks) to put it back in its carrying sleeve, she actually did that for me knowing the difficulty I have when bending or stooping the day after surgery. I made sure to thank her.
The next time I saw XWifeGeeding was that following Monday at DaughterGeeding’s softball game, which was a 30-minute drive. Again, I think she was surprised that I made the trip with our son. But the thing is, it doesn’t matter the pain or inconvenience (like having to rent a car), I want to be an active father and involved in our children’s lives.
We all walked to the game together, but I set my chair in an area near the stands but behind three rows of people. It was great because when I wanted to stand, I could do so and lean forward on the bleachers for support. XWifeGeeding, with her dog, sat at the scorer’s table directly behind home plate. Unfortunately, the umps were a half-hour late, so the game didn’t start on time, which made me even more uncomfortable. Sometimes I’d bury my head in my hat in between innings, not to mention, the sun was blaring directly at us. The ex noticed my discomfort and was actually kind enough to invite me to sit next to her at the scorer’s table. Since the game wasn’t even half-way over and not wanting to be in any more pain or discomfort, I accepted.
Little by little, the ex and I engaged in a lot of small talk. We even made up a cheer for our daughter and were trying to embarrass her. “M-I-C-A-H, Micah Geeding to first base!“
It has been killing me that XWifeGeeding has never talked to me about the divorce. I so wanted to bring it up when I had a chance, but didn’t want to waste any of the goodwill we’ve made. However, I did have that one parenting question I wanted to ask. So, when I felt the moment was right, I told her I had a parenting question, and by answering it, it would give me a better understanding of her parenting philosophy. I wanted to know why our children were not deserving to have both parents in their lives equally?
Her answer didn’t surprise me, but one reason why I wanted to ask her that was I wanted her to see through a different perspective. She basically said that it’s not because the children aren’t deserving, but she didn’t want them of having to go through the stress of switching so often. I let her know that I felt it signaled to them one parent was more important than the other, that we should be communicating to them that both parents are just as important and valuable as the other. Besides, it’s what the kids want, anyway.
How did DaughterGeeding do? She had one of her best games. She got on base every time, though she didn’t get a hit. And even though she had one fielding error, she saw a lot of action at second base. Not bad for a seventh-grader playing against high schoolers.
The evening ended on a bright note. After the game, XWifeGeeding asked if all four of us could take a picture together.
As for any of you who think reconciliation is in the works, she’s been dating a guy for a while now. I continue to tell myself that I deserve someone who treats and values me better than her. But there’s actually hope for a healthy co-parenting relationship.
*A lot of y’all may have been wondering why I haven’t used that name or a variation of ExWifeGeeding. I don’t have an answer for ya. I guess the best answer is it felt too soon. That term was one of affection and I didn’t want to show any.
I just received the most thoughtful get well gift from WifeGeedingII and Mr. WifeGeedingII. pic.twitter.com/7DEajk1Eys
I’m happy to report that my surgery and recovery are going better than expected.
Oddly, after surgery, I’ve been dealing with a chronic case of the hiccups. They have been going on and off for three or four days now. You may remember I’ve had this issue before, but without surgery. Sure, it sounds funny, but after a while, the diaphragm gets really sore and it’s not a laughing matter.
I was told my surgeon was very open about praying with his patients when asked. So, I asked, and he said one of the nicest and sincerest prayers I’ve heard.
For some reason, I like to weigh myself before and after surgery at home before I leave for the hospital. This time, I gained an extra eight pounds. I guess that’s from the hardware installed in me as well as the IV. It really can’t be food or water since I hadn’t had much.
Most of my life, I’ve been hesitant about anyone helping me with anything, much less asking for help. But Keith 1.5 (who’s trying to upgrade to Keith 2.0) is becoming more accepting of help (and taking the advice of U2). I found that I’ve been denying friends and loved ones an opportunity to serve and an opportunity to bring joy to their lives. It’s been great having an old friend drive me to and from surgery and witness my church’s small group (full of retired people who are just waiting and wanting to serve) deliver food.
I pushed myself the day after the surgery by driving BoyGeeding to his soccer game. Furthermore, I drove to DaughterGeeding’s softball game a half-hour away.
To be continued….
Posted inPersonal|Comments Off on Bag of Randomness for Wednesday, April 19, 2023
Today is my friend Jimi’s birthday. As a kid, he would remind everyone that it was his birthday, and it was easy to remember because it was the day Lincoln (Abraham, just in case you were wondering) got shot, the Titanic hit the iceberg, and the day before taxes are due. Sadly and unpredictably, it would also become the day his father will tragically die from falling multiple stories while on the job. Today is also my surgery day. Jimi hardly ever tells me he loves me, but last weekend he indirectly told me by saying enough bad stuff has happened on his birthday and I shouldn’t add to it.
While the ex and I haven’t buried the hatchet, things have cooled down. She will sometimes ask me to help drive the kids to and/or from practice if there’s a conflict, and has sat next to me the last couple of games. We don’t talk about much (there’s a lot I want to talk to her about, trust me) but at least the kids don’t have to look for their parents in two different areas.
I’ve forgiven her for a lot of things, but not sure how I can do so for her breaking up our family or alienating the kids from me.
The ex and I have coordinated a little bit regarding the transportation of our kids and my surgery and recovery.
I’ll be honest, I’ve become more scared as the surgery date approached. I’m sad I’ll wake up from surgery without any family there and scared of going through the recovery alone. Sure, I was able to handle things after my neck surgery just fine, but it’s easier to get around and do things with a bad neck than a bad back. At least it’s an opportunity to build on courage or something like that.
When I was a kid growing up in Mineral Wells (shout-out to the police officer from there who’s a regular reader) I didn’t take the bus to school, but would ride it a lot for sporting events. I have a lot of good memories of riding in school buses, and it was a unique way to bond with friends. That came to mind as my son went on a field trip yesterday. Due to logistics and how their charter school manages things, the only time they ride a school bus is for field trips. So, once or twice a year. A part of me thinks my kids are missing out. I’m also trying to imagine how uncomfortable a two-hour ride in one of those things would be for me nowadays.
I’ve been trying to find another book to read. It will be a good tool to use to pass the time as I recover. I couldn’t decide if I wanted to stick to history and biographies, sports or politics related, switch to something motivational, or find something spiritual. I finally landed on Phil Jackson’s book, Eleven Rings: The Soul of Success. Yup, the Zen master of basketball. It hits all the marks except for politics, but I could tap the brakes on that for a bit. I forgot he’s the son of a preacher. It will be interesting to learn how and why he moved from Christianity to the Zen life, as well as to get some nice Jordan, Shaq, and Kobe stories.
Posted inPersonal|Comments Off on Bag of Randomness for Friday, April 14, 2023
