Last week when my ex sat in my counseling session, she gave me a Biblical reason why she chose divorce. She was doing a devotional and the overall lesson was that God will be with you no matter what decision you make. She felt that was God telling her it was alright to file for a divorce. I have to accept that as her answer, but I bet she probably misinterpreted the overall message of the devotional. I’d like to see what it actually said. Using her rationale, you can justify any sin. For instance, I might be faced with the decision to slap you in the face. I know doing so would be a sin, but since God will be with me no matter what decision I’m going to make, I’m just going to go ahead and slap you. Or, you can say that the unlocked bicycle left outside a store would be nice to have and you’d like to steal it. Stealing would be a sin, but even if I took the bike, God will be with me, so I’m just going to steal that bike.
I did ask the ex if she spoke with someone who was an expert in biblical interpretation, like our pastor or any pastor. She said no and verified she only relied on her mom and sister for biblical advice.
Something else that bothers me that I have to accept is her decision to not give me a second chance, that she made divorce her very first option. I told her that I don’t think we can honestly look our children in the eye and tell them we did everything we could to save our family from breaking apart. For instance, we didn’t go to a single counseling session. Her reply was nothing but silence. It’s hard to accept she didn’t speak to our pastor or any pastor about such a decision regarding her faith.
One other thing I know I have to accept but not like was her belief that I wouldn’t consider a separation. She brought that up towards the end of our marriage in one of our arguments. I do remember her bringing it up out of the blue and I responded with a no. That was because I thought separation is the last resort before divorce, and we haven’t even tried counseling. If we tried counseling and that didn’t work, then yes, I think separation is a viable option. But going straight to separation just wasn’t logical in my book.
Sometimes I miss my old house and all the cool stuff I had that made me happy. That’s why I’m posting this sentence that I found, “The more you have physically, the more you have to lose, and thus, the more worried you become about losing it all.”
