This line Milhouse said to Bart kept getting funnier the more I thought about it, “Trust me, Bart. It’s better to walk in on both parents instead of one of them.”
I really want to write about this new girl I’m smitten with, but fear I’m going to jinx it. She did answer the following question correctly: “Bruce Wayne and Tony Stark decide to play a game chess, using a Star Wars special edition chess set. Tony lets Bruce pick the colors. Does Bruce choose the dark side or the light side?”
I’ll just say one other thing about her, she can out-blog me. Seriously, she used to get paid to blog, she was a professional blogger. And her ex went to Baylor.
For therapeutic reasons, here’s a list of thing I wish my ex would have had the courage to say before she kidnapped our kids and darted off to her mother’s house:
Keith, our marriage is on the verge of breaking.
No, I don’t want to renew our vows because …”
We should start sleeping apart.
I know the rifle thing happened three months ago but I still have questions about it.
You told me if we saw a marriage counselor, he or she would just say exactly what you’ve been telling me. Well, let’s see if you’re right, let’s go see one.
I know you said you’re only joking, but what you say actually hurts me.
Raise your voice at me one more time and I’m divorcing you.
I’ve been unhappy for years and have been hiding it.
I don’t think I should be the one to tell my sister she was wrong about not texting ahead of time that she would be running late with the kids because she’s feeding them.
I’m sorry you feel that way, but this is how I feel about it and this is what I’m going to do.
