Bag of Randomness for Wednesday, March 9, 2022

  • I saw my neurosurgeon for a post-op checkup yesterday. He said I’ve recovered and healed better than expected. As long as I use common sense, I may resume regular activities. But some activities, like jumping on the trampoline with the children, should be held off for several more months. However, there was a bit of concern regarding an area near the fusion he performed a little over three years ago. Eventually, I’ll need a day procedure to clean up the facet area to relieve the pain I’m suffering from some advanced arthritis. Thankfully, it would be an outpatient procedure and the recovery will be much easier than a fusion. I asked if this is something if I could grit through for the rest of my life and he said no. I followed up asking if I’d need to have the procedure in about ten years, and he said sooner than that. So, I said five, and again he said less than that. It felt like I was in an episode of The $10,000 Pyramid. He said anywhere between later this year and three years.
  • With yesterday’s post-op visit, I think I’m at a place in which I feel comfortable rebuilding my life physically, emotionally, financially, and spiritually. Of course, I’m not out of the woods just yet. But all through this painful experience I felt like I was building a house of cards, and right when I was about to complete the mid tier, it would all come crashing down. So many times when I spoke with other dirvorced men, they would counsel me and say I’m not even through the worst part of it yet. There was so much I had to wait for to pass and I’m leaving a lot out: the custodial trial, the psych exam, completing anger management and parallel parenting classes, mediation, selling the house, moving, paying legal bills and giving her half of my retirement and then some, all of the “firsts”, as well as surgery and recovery. No longer do I have to accept or rationalize the behavior of a negligent and unfaithful wife or put up with her toxic relatives. I’m free (for the most part).
  • What do I mean by toxic? Well, the last conversation I had with my then father-in-law, he told his half-Asian son-in-law that the black man would always be a burden of the white man, but white women were bleeding the black out of the black man, so that was making things better. No joke, that really happened, I swear on a stack of bibles. I can still recall the man driving me around his small East Texas town and pointing out the “N-church” where they cook real good food. I remember confiding in my wife about this, and all she was able to do was give me a head nod. I also remember the time I was around her brother who asked, “When was the last time you saw a tall China-man?” Then, there was the time he embarrassed me on a golf course. I waited until we got back to the house and it was just me and him, apart from everyone else. I politely asked him why he did what he did. He wouldn’t answer or even look at me in the face. He just turned his back and walked away. His mother’s excuse was that he just doesn’t like confrontation. I don’t think that excuses the action of an adult and her judgement of her children were always clouded. And, there was the first time my ex told her mother about me and revealed I was half-Asian. She responded with, “How Asian does he look?” I’m just sorry the quarter-Asian children I’m extremely proud of will continue to be around these folks. I was always walking on eggshells with these people. Hopefully, my ex will refrain from saying she “Jew(ed) someone down” when she bargained a good deal, at least in front of the kids.
  • Nothing I said above is a lie or an exaggeration.
  • I hate the idea because of my ex filing for divorce, I broke a covenant with God. But one man counseled me that I never broke the covenant, she did, and all I did was make a legal agreement with the state of Texas. I agree, but disagree, but agree enough that I find comfort in it.
  • I informed the mother of my daughter I no longer have confidence in the ability of the child counselor she chose to provide the mental health care our daughter needs. Should anything happen, I will find her negligent. There’s someone else I feel is more capable and I’m much more comfortable with.
  • I may take off from blogging next week. Last year, I didn’t have my children for spring break as my ex was alienating them from me. This year, I have a binding legal agreement which says I can take them anywhere in the country. It’s time to get out and do some fun and memorable stuff. Working from home and no longer being part of a family full time has taken a toll.
  • My electric car my not have the range I desire but at least I don’t have to pay for gas.
  • Family of former US Marine detained in Russia speaks with Biden after his Texas stop
    • I didn’t expect this family to get a meeting with the president and was pleasantly surprised and thought it was cool of him to actually all the family. Following it by sending them a rosary was also a nice touch.
  • New York City man rescued twice in 2 days on Arizona hikes
  • Central Florida Teacher Charged for Allegedly Biting Students Over Jar of Pickles
  • The game used to be faster and much more enjoyable to watch.

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