I edited the list by modifying the curse words, but you can view the original list here.
Only one man who has ever lived has been bad enough to be called â€œThe Man In Blackâ€ and it wasnâ€™t Chuck Norris
Johnny didnâ€™t have to fight to be a tough guy. He just had to pick up a beer bottle and a guitar.
Norris made a bunch of films where he killed folks. Johnny Cash went to Folsom Prison and did a concert. You tell me which one takes more guts.
Chuck wasnâ€™t the first of his kind to kick butt. Johnny was the first rock star to set something on fire. While most artists only set their hotel rooms on fire, Johnny took it one step further and burned down half a national forest.
When Chuck was five, he was a normal five year old. Johnny had already earned man points by working in his dadâ€™s cotton fields.Â By the time he was six, Cash did more hard work than most men do in their whole life.
Chuck never got stabbed in the back by a woman. Johnny never stopped bleeding. Chuck may have gotten punched a few times, but Johnny knew what real pain was.
Chuck is a republican. Johnny was close with every president except for GWB. It was said he just didnâ€™t trust that weasel. When Johnny didnâ€™t trust someone, you just knew something foul was going on.
Johnny was invited to play the at White House in 1972 for Richard Nixon. He was given a list of politically correct songs to sing. He instead metaphorically threw up his middle finger at the establishment and sang a set full of left leaning, politically charged tunes. Chuck Norris has never told the president to take off in his own house.
Chuck Norris made a lot of crappy movies. Johnny Cash never touched anything that didnâ€™t turn to gold. In the 80â€™s, he made a song called â€œChicken in Blackâ€ to get himself out of a record deal. Even that became popular.
Johnny is the only man in history to decline painkillers after a double bypass heart surgery. He knew he liked drugs tooÂ damn much and wouldnâ€™t stop. That shows power over an addiction previously not seen before. Kicking a ninja’sÂ rear end is easy compared to kicking a drug’s butt.
Writer’s Note: I am by no means a country music fan, but Johnny Cash transcends genre.