This weekend I met with my closest friends who are fellow members of a scholarship selection committee to designate a winner for the scholarship set up to honor our late good friend. I wish the winner, that will be announced, in May I think, the very best.
WifeGeeding mentioned that the week leading up to this meeting I tend to be pretty excited and eager to meet my old buddies, but thinks after the meeting I’m usually somewhat frustrated and depressed. She’s dead on, and I think it’s because just about all of them have remained the same personality wise, and I’ve changed quite a bit, so it’s never the good ol’ days like I think it will be. After my friends left this weekend, I really did nothing but try to nap and sit in silence thinking, looking out the window waiting for the weekend to be over. Heck, even my daughter was asking my wife why I was so sad.
Two of the last three years after hitting several tangents and trying to get everyone focused back on selecting a winner during our meetings, I’ve said something that had caused someone to leave the room out of anger. Despite my best intentions, I can’t deliver the message well, so I’m guessing I must not play well with others.
It’s frustrating when I see my fellow scholarship selection committee members play/use their electronic devices while we discuss and try to narrow down a winner. It makes me think that as a group we aren’t taking this process seriously when our decision can make a huge impact on a young person’s life, and that we may not be honoring our friend in the best of ways.
If there’s one thing that sets me up for anger, it’s being cut off while speaking. It tells me I’m not respected enough to even finish a sentence and you are arrogant enough to think what I’m about to say has no value.
I was told this weekend that I have hurt more people than I know. That really, really hurts, because I do my best to make those around me happy and care way too much what other people think of me. That one is going to stick with me for a while, and I guess I have to accept that criticism.
Each year one of us is responsible for a Bible study to start things off, and this year I was responsible for the task. I decided to use the story of King Uzziah. In short, God selected Uzziah as a young leader who has a lot of fame and success in his rule, but later in his life overstep his boundaries in the temple and was cursed with leprosy and couldn’t even be buried in the royal cemetery. Judging by the faces and reactions of my friends, I fear I did a poor job of relating the story to our role. After having each read a portion of the the passage, which I printed on paper and handed out, I asked my pastor friend for one or two things that stood out, thinking he would say that Uzziah had a lot of success or was selected as a young leader or how God cursed him, and my buddy just asked if I could come back to him.
We did spend some time at Top Golf Dallas. Even though I’m not much of a golfer, it was fun.