for winning the Super Bowl MPV.
He is now officially in the Half-Asian Hall of Fame.
Other members of the HAHOF are Tiger Woods, Rob Schneider, Johnny Damon, Keanu Reeves, Brandon Lee, and Mark-Paul Gosselaar. Dean Cain would have made it, but he is only a quarter asian.
And if you ever wanted to explore the half-asian identity, click here.
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Dear Jack VS Chuck,
I am a college student and my roommate never cleans up his side of the room. It is disgusting. He lives on the side of the room closest to the door so not only do I have to see (and smell) his mess I have to walk through it to get to my bed. I have asked him in the past to clean up. I have even cleaned some of it myself, but I refuse to be his maid. How can I get him to keep the place somewhat clean?
Jared, WI
Dear Jared,
This is what Jack Bauer would do:
First Jack Bauer would make a visit to his roommate’s hometown. He would take high zoom black and white photos of his roommate’s family, including the dog. Upon getting back to school he would advise his roommate it is in his family’s best interest for him to clean up his half of the room within an hour, then drop a manila envelope with the photos in it on his bed.
This would be Jack’s first and only warning. If the room were not cleaned within an hour, Jack would use the following 23 hours to make sure his roommate understood the severity of his lack of action.
Jack Bauer would hide in the closet awaiting the return of his roommate. When his roommate walks in the room Jack would throw a bag over his head and tie him to a chair. He would shoot his roommate in both kneecaps and threaten to cut off each of his fingers unless he cleaned up the room.
This is what Chuck Norris would do:
Chuck Norris would administer several roundhouse kicks to the head for each minute that his roommate refused to clean up his half of the room.
Either approch should work. Good Luck.
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