It felt like a busy weekend.
Friday night was our annual scholarship weekend, during which we selected a winner for the scholarship our late friend’s mother created to honor him. As I turn 50 later this year, I’ve reflected a lot. One thought is how the number of these weekends ahead of us is now fewer than the ones behind us. With that in mind, I try to appreciate the time together, do more listening than speaking, and simply be grateful. One of us has a child getting married next month. We are all old enough now to be grandparents, and accepting that this passage of time is incredibly humbling. We wrapped up scholarship weekend with a very early breakfast on Saturday since one of us had other obligations.
Later that day, I had plans for a date with an Amy Adams doppelgänger. I thought she was going to text me after her lunchtime hot yoga class and a quick shower, which I believed would be around 1:30 PM. Then we would meet at a restaurant in Frisco. Around 1:45 PM, she texted that she was already at the restaurant and was concerned I may have misinterpreted her texts. And that is exactly what happened. She apologized for not being clearer. I just felt awful about it. Things are awkward now, and we are both on radio silence.
Luckily, I had also received a thoughtful and kind reply from another remarkable woman on a dating app. She said she was free this weekend and gave me her number. I figured, what the heck, let’s go for it. We decided to be spontaneous and started throwing ideas around. A Tina Fey reference came up, and shortly after, I discovered that both she and Amy Poehler were performing in Grand Prairie in about two hours. I asked if she wanted to go, and she immediately said, “I’m in.”
Despite never having met me, she vetted me enough to be comfortable with me picking her up. Without traffic, we would have made it just ten minutes before the show started. Finally, a woman officially rode in my new car. She was more than worthy to be the first. Despite feeling a little rushed, trying to get to know each other while following the GPS, we worked through the awkwardness of meeting for the first time pretty well.
Unfortunately, the venue was having trouble managing traffic and parking, so we did not get inside until about thirty minutes after the scheduled start. Since there was nothing we could do, we used the time to get to know each other better. The old me would have been stressed about missing the beginning and being stuck in slow-moving traffic, but I was really enjoying her company. Thankfully, there was a warm-up act, and we had not missed Tina and Amy taking the stage.
When we finally made it inside, it was much darker than expected, and my old eyes had trouble adjusting. Our seats were at the very top, right up near the ceiling. The steep stairs had no handrails, and my back felt weak, and a little vertigo kicked in. I probably looked like a bumbling idiot trying to climb those stairs, sometimes practically on all fours. It was as unmanly as can be. Some kind souls even pulled out their phones to light the steps for me. Thankfully, we made it safely to our seats, which were literally at the very back and top with nothing but the wall behind us and the ceiling close enough to touch by hand. A few minutes later, Tina and Amy walked out to kick off the show with better-than-expected local humor. That’s actually them in the photo and not a bunch of colorful ants.
My date was really enjoying herself. For once, I felt very present, not thinking about the past or the future. Her laugh was infectious. For the first time since 2001, my arm was around a woman who was not the mother of my children. Expectations for Tina and Amy were high, and they exceeded them.
After the show, we decided to stay seated and let the crowd thin out before heading back to the car. The lines to the restroom were too long, so we decided to find a place to eat near her place. We ended up at a Cheddar’s, and even though I was not hungry, I ordered something just to keep her comfortable. I can’t recall the last time I got seated at a restaurant after 9:30 PM, but the conversation was wonderful, and I can’t recall the last time I felt this comfortable being myself around another woman.
Dinner was easy and relaxed. Conversation flowed as we both let our guard down and shared some vulnerable information, and for the first time in a long time, I felt truly comfortable being myself with a woman. We even held hands, took several goofy pictures, and even sincerely laughed uncontrollably once, something I haven’t done in a very long time.
We only decided to leave once we noticed the staff trying to close up, so we headed out holding hands until I opened the car door for her. When we arrived at her place, I kissed her hand, brought it to my chest, and with a big smile, thanked her for a wonderful evening. Driving home, I guess I was on cloud nine. When I got home, I told DogGeedingII and OtherDogGeedingII all about my night and her doggo, Fin.
After I arrived home from church on Sunday, I sent her a text, including a link to something we had discussed that I promised to share. She never replied. Now I feel like a fool again, wondering if I can ever lower my guard again.
Thankfully, I had another late lunchtime date scheduled with another woman I had been chatting with. She was cool, and I felt at ease the whole time, I think the previous evening upped my confidence. After our time at a brewery, I asked if I could walk her to her car. She said I could as long as I did not pin her against it, which felt a little odd considering our conversation had been completely respectful.
It took a bit to find her car, but when we did, I kept a respectful distance, thanked her for her time, and we left it at that without a handshake or hug. Later that evening, she texted me to say she enjoyed meeting me, liked our conversation, and thanked me for paying. I am not sure what that means, but it was thoughtful of her to reach out.
Now I am trying to do my best not to overthink everything.
