Your Bag of Nothing for Friday, May 9, 2025

  • Now that the new Pope is from Chicago, I can’t stop picturing a packed St. Peter’s Square at night. The lights cut out, the crowd hushes… then suddenly — BOOM — the Chicago Bulls intro music blasts through the speakers. A spotlight hits the balcony, and the announcer booms:

    “Aaaaaand now… from Villanova University (seriously)… wearing white and red… number 14… POPE LEOOOOO!”

    Can somebody make this happen using AI, please? For now, I’ll have to settle for this.

  • I know formally he’s Pope Leo XIV, and his birth name is Robert Francis Prevost, but how cool would it be if he just went by Pope Bob? It’s hard for me to ignore that his middle name is(was) Francis. And when I come across that name, this is the first character I think about.
  • Pope Leo should wear a white Villanova hat at all official functions during March Madness. I can only imagine how pissed Notre Dame fans are that the first Pope from the United States graduated from Villanova. In case you were wondering, he was a math major.
  • Made me laugh: *Camera pans to a group of fans outside of the Vatican in Pope jerseys, going nuts even though most of them haven’t heard of the pick before last week*
  • It was pretty cool seeing Pope Leo’s brother being interviewed shortly after the announcement. What an amazing, unique experience that he got to experience.
  • I see a lot of non-Catholics complaining that this isn’t a big deal. I, for one, am just happy that my Catholic brothers and sisters have something to be happy about and feel some joy in such a chaotic world.
  • The world missed having a Catholic U.S. President and an American Pope by four months. I’m pretty sure most of the world is feeling a bit of USA fatigue.
  • “We should be grateful to the Lord to now be blessed with having an American on the world stage who embodies good and not evil.”
  • “America now has both the pope and the antichrist”
  • I bet a lot of people will start watching the Jude Law HBO series The Young Pope, which is about the first Pope from the United States. I enjoyed watching it, but know it’s not for everyone.
  • Tom Cruise will be in Dallas on May 22, visiting local theaters for his Mission: Impossible film. When I watched Born on the Fourth of July for the first time earlier this year, I read about the making of the movie since most of it was filmed in Dallas. Cruise seemed to have really enjoyed his time here when he was a young actor.
  • Dallas-Fort Worth is sinking faster than any other inland U.S. cityStudy shows
    Dallas and Fort Worth are sinking at a rate of 4 millimeters per year due to groundwater loss
  • A firing squad tried to shoot a prisoner in the heart. They missed, autopsy indicates

  • Trump Organization Admits President Still Controls His Business In New FilingDonald Trump can lie to the American public, but the Trump Organization has a harder time deceiving authorities in Britain, where private companies face greater disclosure requirements.


  • There’s a lot going on here. I think it’s a new trend for the bridesmaid to hand the groom provocative boudoir-type polaroid photos of his bride getting ready.

    In the second video, you have the Cowboys’ home stadium in the background, and the groom is assisted in putting the finishing touch on the end of the ceremony. Who cares about the height difference? I just care that they love each other.

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Your Bag of Nothing for Thursday, May 8, 2025

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Your Bag of Nothing for Wednesday, May 7, 2025

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Your Bag of Nothing for Monday, May 5, 2025

  • My loyal BagOfNothing reader who writes for SNL told me to be watching Weekend Update because his tailor-made joke for me made the cut, and he told me I would know it when I saw it, without question. It’s gotta be this one since I turn half a century later this year and often reference that I’m half-Asian (Vietnamese). Touché. Well played. I’m honored, really. It should be queued up to the joke, but if not, it starts at the 9:50 spot. (Updated and fixed)

  • I think this Giants rookie should just be looking for another number, but good on Simms.



  • I got into a conversation about the Pearl Jam song Jeremy. Many local folks are surprised to learn it’s a local story that happened in January 1991 at Richardson High School. The song is about the tragic incident when a freshman student named Jeremy took his own life by firing a .357-caliber Magnum into his mouth in front of a room full of other students in his morning English class. Many were astonished to learn that the school stayed open and classes continued throughout the day instead of sending all the students home.




    Many just chalked it up to 1991 being a different time, that things were handled differently back then, and mental health wasn’t a priority. Well, as someone who was a high school student in 1991, I’d like everyone to consider it’s not so much that, but that the world wasn’t as connected as it is now. In 1991, no student had a mobile phone, and only a few had a pager, of all things. There was no internet or social media. It was a lot harder to get in touch with parents, most of whom would have been at work. Each parent would have to be contacted by a landline phone. Not to mention, if you decided to just send the students home, more than likely, no one would be at home to monitor or take care of them after such a tragedy. No one took into consideration the logistics of making all that happen with safety as a priority in 1991. Really, the best option back then was to keep the students on campus and be mindful that they are in the middle of a traumatic situation. While the article says classes continued, I highly doubt lesson plans were followed for the rest of the day.
  • I’m sure most of you are familiar with this photo of a US Air Force officer who was a Vietnam POW reuniting with his family. It always tugged on my heartstrings.




    However, do you know the sad story behind the photo?


    Recently, the daughter in the photo running to hug her father was interviewed about the photo. It’s actually quite touching. She has a copy of the photo hung up on her wall and even brings out the clothing he wore as a POW. Heck, his slippers or flip-flops are made from the tires of his wrecked aircraft. The segment focuses only on the positive side. The veteran is still living, but is a dementia patient, around 92 years of age.

  • I hope this is true.

  • Tommy Tuberville says his wife’s homestead exemption established his residency in Alabama, but election records show both of them voted in Florida after that. And that’s only the beginning.

    [image or embed]

    — Jon Cooper (@joncooper-us.bsky.social) May 2, 2025 at 8:58 AM

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